On Monday I spent the better part of an hour on the phone with an old man trying to help him login to his online email account.
“Okay, now enter your username and password.”
“My what?”
“Your username and password.”
“My what?”
“Your username and password.”
“What’s that?”
On Tuesday I helped another old guy “fix his broken computer” by showing him how to disable Outline Dragging in solitaire.
“My computer don’t work.”
“What’s the problem exactly?”
“When I try to drag a card it disappears on me.”
“...........uhhhh........oh, I think I know…”
On Wednesday I tried to explain to a lady how computers can get viruses even if (or especially if) you just paid sixty dollars for the latest Norton anti-virus protection software. I don’t think she believed me. She didn’t want to believe. Perhaps I now know how Mulder felt. Annoying.
“So, how did this virus get on my computer anyway? I have that Norton protection. It cost me sixty bucks.”
“Norton’s detection software isn’t perfect. There really isn’t any way to stay 100% protected as long as you’re connected to the internet.”
“So, I paid Norton sixty bucks for nothing, and now I have to pay you eighty five??”
“Yes. Plus tax.”
On Thursday I had to spend nearly all day moving everything in one office to another office and visa versa. Such a pain.
On Friday my boss messed up an order on parts for a server we are building. I had to listen to him make every attempt imaginable at placing the blame on someone other than himself, then complain about how much this mistake was going to cost him.
On Saturday I slept in, had the day off work, lounged around, and watched Kung Fu Panda for the first time. Hilarious!
Ok. Now that you're up to speed with my week, allow me to switch from recalling the past to explaining the future.
Today. Sunday.
Because of this day, I will be able to forget every last stupid person I had to deal with during the week. Every textbook chapter I had to read. Every test I had to take. And all this for a very, very special and legitimate reason. Allow me now to explain why this Sunday is a bit more special than any other given Sunday.
Two words.
Pie Night.
At approximately six thirty tonight, me and my immediate and extended family will journey to the home of my grandparents to eat pie. Lots and lots of pie. Each family will bring an unhealthily beautiful number of pies with great variety to be shared. Tonight pumpkin, raspberry, butter pecan, apple, key lime, banana crème, chocolate, ice cream, and peach pies will accompany a plethora of delicious homemade cheesecakes to fill my grandmother’s kitchen to the brim and provide me with everything I need to gain ten pounds. There are only a handful of days in the year that I look forward to more than this one.
Last year I ate thirteen pieces. This year I’m shooting for seventeen. It is going to be a good evening.
Wish me luck.
My son, the Hero of the Blizzard
13 years ago
5 comments:
I don't even know you. AND, you're a funny guy.
Pie night.
Nice. Your username and password. Ha!
At the risk of seeing myself on your blog, should I be worried if my computer freezes during boot-up about every other time? Right on the text screen about BIOS. I have Windows Pissta.
I wish you luck, though by this time of night you will need it to not throw up or have a heart attack. Mmm Pies.
Freezing on the BIOS screen usually isn't a great thing. It is probably having a hard time detecting some piece of hardware. Hard to say exactly what is wrong. It's possible that nothing is seriously wrong with it at all. I guess as long as it keeps working semi-consistently...
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